Where words only sting a little bit


No More Cow Bell

No More Cow Bell


Happy New Year Hawkeye Nation. Another NYD Bowl Game for Kirk Ferentz. He owned this day in his 1st decade as Head Hawk. The 2nd decade has been more turbulent than a ride in the movie Airplane. This is officially the beginning of the 3rd decade of the Kirk Ferentz era at Iowa. Time for the blaze of glory for a great man, who may be the last coach to last 20+ years at a university. Patience has paid off in IC, but since it’s in NYD here be some resolutions for Hawkeye Nation to occur within the next 12 months:

  1. Kirk Ferentz employs a blend of the best philosophy. This is rarely executed as leaders don’t listen to the people and embrace short sighted stubbornness. Kirk listens and has a long term vision (especially with his son as OC). Continue to evolve good captain with your brand of player development combined with better recruiting and improved schemes, the Hawkeyes win a National Title in the next 5 years.
  2. Beat Wisconsin and Northwestern. Seriously. Now. Enough of the losing to these rivals (cant believe I’m saying the Nerds are a rival).
  3. The Kinnick Wave is awesome. Cheer louder each game between Q1 and Q2.
  4. Promote high level tailgating. More juice outside more juice inside.
  5. Attack. Especially on offense. Fear no one. The last notch on Kirk’s cowhide leather belt is Rose Bowl glory. Go get it like no tomorrow Kirk.
  6. Make Rocky Balboa a secondary mascot. No explanation necessary. America baby.
  7. Play Top Gun for pregame and Rocky IV at halftime. See #6.
  8. Use the Outback Bowl vs Mississippi St (they say their mascot is a Bulldog but really its a cow bell) as a launching pad into the next decade of glory for Hawkeye Football. Everyone loves the SEC but its really Alabama and everyone else riding off of Nick Saban’s houndstooth coattails. Iowa produces men that are tougher, smarter, and better looking than anyone. A fresh reminder early in 2019 is needed.
  9. No more cow bell. Put that low rent piece of garbage back in the potato sack you rode in on and return to Mississippi wishing your boys could be Hawkeyes.
  10. Christopher Walken loves the Hawkeyes. Have him toss the coin on opening day at Kinnick Stadium.

Stiks pik to clik: My resolution for 2019 to keep it simple so I’m piking the obvious: Hawkeye TE TJ Hockenson. Awarded Tight End of the year in college football. Likely 1st round draft pick in April. The SEC doesnt play tight ends. They just play scared. Mississippi is led by a former Penn St coach, but as we learned from Joe Pa, intelligence is not required there. The Hawkeyes invest in the right scheme and set up TJ for a George Kittle esque 185 yards and 2 TDs. Oh yeah the Hawk D pitches a shutout. Mississippi St played four games against top-30 defenses this year and scored a combined 16 points (that’s 4 points per game for you Iowa St fans). They’ll play a fifth one in the Outback Bowl. The Polynesian Panther #94 has 3 sacks for the black and gold.

Game kicks at 11am on ESPN2. Grab some hair of the dog and enjoy the launch of a sensational Hawkeye run. The SEC likes extra pulp in their screw driver. Drink a Bloody Mary and more Coors Light. In Heaven There is Beer….